I came across this the other day and decided to post it here so I can look back on it when life starts to get crazy, as it always does. I worry too much about things like career, money and other "important" things that you really can't take with you. I need to make this blog more of a priority as my hope is that one day, when I'm gone, Jude will be able to pull this up and read and still feel my love for him emanating from these simple words. I need to learn to stop and give my husband one extra kiss or lingering touch every day and resist the urge to check my work email on my phone in the evenings while Jude hands me cloth diaper after cloth diaper that he pulls out of his drawer. "Thank you, Jude, " I smile. "Yup. Yup mama." he says as he reaches for another, bursting with pride and confidence at what a good helper his mother thinks he is.
"Long ago you came to me,
a miracle of firsts;
First smiles and teeth and baby steps,
a sunbeam on the burst.
But one day you will move away
and leave me to your past.
And I will be left thinking of
of a lifetime of your lasts..."
"The last time when you ran to me,
still small enough to hold.
The last time when you said you'd marry
me when you got old.
Precious, simple moments and
bright flashes from your past-
Would I have held on longer if
I'd have known they were your last?"
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